Watching MTV - TRUE LIFE- Desperate for a baby

So I am relaxing watching MTV and a TRUE LIFE episode came on- about infertility.

One of the girls has had 5 failed IVF's and the other is stressed starting her first cycle.

Sometimes, I forget that other people are going through this too-

I wish I had someone to talk to about how I feel- but at the same time- I find a pretty good balance of knowing that it will all work out.

I mean, if I stopped and cried every single day--- that would be horrible!


I do have an update- we have tried again this month naturally- and I have a good feeling- AGAIN- ahahhaha!

But I am going back to the IVF clinic on day 2 of this cycle to hopefully start IVF #3.

And this time we have decided to do Minimal IVF instead of our 2 failed Fresh Natural IVF's.....


My show is back on- bye!

What is next!?!?!!?!

I am trying to decide on what to do....

I have a couple choices at the moment.

#1 book a trip to Maui for my bday in September for 8 days!!!!! (um, my dream)- Have the $ now

#2 continue to save for another round of IVF - Would have to save another month

#3 REALLY save and do a round of Minimal Stimulation IVF - Would have to save 2 months


I guess we are just wondering if we should relax and vacation then start again near the holidays or skip our vaction and possibly deal w. another heartbreak....


It is so hard to know what to do.

In the meantime, we are trying naturally again this month.....ugggghhhhh.


I will keep you all posted.

I finally called!!!

So today I forced myself to call our IVF center.
I wanted to know if the doctor should have called me after our 2nd failed IVF or what I am supposed to do next.

Here is my frustration..... There is a major language barrier w. the staff-

So I asked them- What do I do next?

What CD should I schedule my Hysteroscopy????


They had no idea what I was talking about.

The nurse seriously said this to me.

Nurse: Why would you have that done? Do you have fibroids?

Me: The doctor recommened that after my 1st failed IVF. And since I have NOT gotten pregant after my 2nd IVF- I think it would be a good idea

Nurse: Silence

Nurse: What is your queston?

Me: When do I come in for the test? What will the test involve?

Nurse: Do you have an embryo?

Me: What???

Nurse: If you don't, you have to come in on CD 2 and we will do an ultra sound and start monitoring for another cycle.

Me: Pulling my hair out!


So- at this point - since I am CD 6- I will have to wait for another cycle--- Uggghhh! Kinda my fault.


I was so frustrated w. how the phoen conversation went w. my center- I called my OBGYN office.

They are the office I did 3 rounds of clomid with.... I want a 2nd opinion on what to do next. I made an appointment to see the nurse next Friday- The doctor isn't taking appointments until September!!!!!

I am feeling so far away from having a baby right now:(

I need to stay focused.

Time to get motivated!

I am on CD4 and have intended to call my IVF doctor and inquire about the procedure see if I have any  scar tissue .....
I think it is called a hysteroscopy.

I don't know why I am having a hard time calling to make the appointment.

I am dreading even talking to the receptionist and explaining WHY I want this....

That I need/want this because I have had (2) failed IVF's.

Please GOD let me find the strength to not let more time go by --- I will call tomorrow:)

Happy 4th of July!

Hello Everyone:

Happy 4th of July!

Sorry I have not updated lately.

I guess I haven't updated since there is nothing to update.


I am currently 10 days away from AF... we tried on our own this month- you never know!


My boobs totally hurt!!!!!!



xoxo